I emailed Tantus last week because someone bought stuff on their site through my affiliate link, but the sale didn’t show up in my affiliate control panel. I was directed to Jenn, whom I’ve had a lovely time emailing back-and-forth with. To my great surprise, our conversation turned into a chat about what colors of sex toys I like/loathe1, and how I don’t own any dual-density O2 toys from Tantus. Little did I know what would come next.
Tantus is a small company with a limited budget, but somehow, Jenn pulled some strings and sent me a box of goodies that is going to single-handedly wipe out all the rest of my sex toy storage space.
My jaw. It dropped.
Seriously, I felt like a celeb as I opened this box. This is, like, a once-in-a-blogger’s-lifetime package. I opened the box slowly, savoring every wonderful inclusion:
- Two packets of “Grow Your Own Dildo Tree” seeds2
- A deliciously subtle shirt that says Not Your Mama’s Treehugger
- Two butt plugs: Bronco and Cody
- O2 Revolution, a dildo I’ve wanted for ages!
- The newly-released Cush O2
- Mikey O2 and Adam O2
- Three yet-to-be released dildos, all of which are large, and one of which is terrifyingly massive (update: I can now name them! They are the Luke O2, Max O2, and — oh god — T-Rex.)
Holy crap, Tantus. Way to make a girl (and her vagina) feel special. Also, practically all the toys are big. I see what you did there. CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Extremely preliminary tests reveal that the O2 Revolution, Cush O2, Mikey O2, and one of the unreleased dildos are all superb. And I’m not just saying that! Unfortunately, I have a lot on my “to review” plate right now, but some of these need to be reviewed, so that I may shout from the rooftops how awesome they are.
Thanks again, Jenn and Tantus. Y’all are too much!
- You better believe I have an insanely neurotic opinion about this! [↩]
- No, I have no idea what they are. There is no info on the packets. I have to PLANT THEM AND FIND OUT. [↩]
If you liked this, you might also enjoy these posts:
- Tantus, your neon colors are killin’ me
- Sneak peek at the new Tantus Curve
- Tantus Sherbet and old packaging
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August 17th, 2011 at 3:00 pm
Insanely jealous! I can’t wait to read what you think about them!
August 17th, 2011 at 3:23 pm
I haven’t tried the O2 products yet either. Can’t wait to read how they measure up!
August 17th, 2011 at 3:57 pm
1. HOW MUCH BIGGER IS THE REVOLUTION O2 THAN IT LOOKS ONLINE???
2. I want the Cush O2 super bad.
3. I can’t wait to find out what a dildo tree is.
August 17th, 2011 at 4:48 pm
@Britni TheVadgeWig: Definitely bigger, but that’s a good thing!
August 17th, 2011 at 8:14 pm
That. Is. Awesome. How wonderful and generous of them!
I have had a couple of Tantus products on my wishlist for a while, so I am looking forward to the reviews!
I have strong feelings about sex toy colors, so I am behind you on that one. That’s why I tend to gravitate toward glass/acrylic toys or steel. I can’t go wrong with those. <3
August 17th, 2011 at 11:45 pm
Wow you are a rock star and Tantus take the cake on being awesome.
August 18th, 2011 at 3:57 am
Wow Tantus definitely are very generous, looking forward to reading your reviews on them.
I have never tried any tantus products yet, but I love the look of the Mikey 02, gorgeous curves.
Er what is a dildo tree… every girl’s dream…?
Keep up the great work Epiphora.
August 18th, 2011 at 1:09 pm
the dildo tree might be seeds to a palm similar to this guy: http://www.flickr.com/photos/yonas1/3579332114/
i’ve seen them in florida. i don’t know if they’d grow up further north, unless you’ve got a greenhouse. but still. whee!
August 18th, 2011 at 2:32 pm
Wow, what an awesome gesture – we just got the Cush in stock – it’s got me curious…can’t wait to hear about this mission!
August 18th, 2011 at 2:35 pm
Wow!! What a haul!!! And you just HAVE to keep us updated on that dildo tree you will be growing! I tried to Google Dildo Tree Seeds and got nothing. Majorly curious now!
August 18th, 2011 at 4:33 pm
You LUCKY thing!
August 18th, 2011 at 7:09 pm
Holy freaking jealous! I was very curious what the O2 Max and Luke were all about when I spotted them in your toybox list. Soo excited to hear about this madness.
August 18th, 2011 at 8:30 pm
OMG that is too awesome, like Christmas in August! And please do let us know what grows from the Dildo Tree seeds… my inquiring mind is nosy (lol)
August 18th, 2011 at 8:37 pm
Grow your own dildo tree?! This sounds too good to be true. Is this a sexier version of a pyramid scheme?
It wouldn’t matter. I’m in for the win.
Can’t wait to hear more about the new releases!
August 18th, 2011 at 9:58 pm
That is so awesome. Mikey and the Revolution are wonderful.
The dildo seed packets have real seeds in them? If so show me a pic of them. I might be able to tell what they are.
August 20th, 2011 at 8:10 pm
Jenn told me what the seeds were in a convo a while back. It’ll be fun.
I’m quite jealous!
August 20th, 2011 at 9:01 pm
“Grow Your Own Dildo Tree”! I’m cracking up! I love that it’s so mysterious. I read recently about a woman who was famous for growing penis-shaped squash. I wonder if these seeds are what she uses? Ha! What a great box of goodies, I look forward to reading your reviews on them – and you’ve got to post a follow-up once your dildo tree starts growing!
August 21st, 2011 at 9:33 am
that’s like 30 pounds worth of dildos right there. like everyone else here *jealous*
August 25th, 2011 at 1:44 am
How awesome!
August 28th, 2011 at 8:41 pm
Amazing! You are a sex toy rockstar & I am officially lusting after the O2 Cush! Can’t wait for the reviews.
August 29th, 2011 at 10:39 am
Congrats on the haul, wow! I’m curious about how the Adam 02 compares to the Vixen Mustang texture-wise (I can wait if you’d rather not spoil your upcoming reviews). Does one seem more lifelike to you than the other? Plus, Tantus has always said that their regular silicone toys are okay with silicone lube (not that I’d risk the interaction anyway, but it’s good to know I’d have the option if I had to)…do they say if the O2 silicone won’t interact with it?
September 4th, 2011 at 7:34 pm
@Trix: The Adam has a matte texture to it that is okay but not as good as the texture of VixSkin (which I don’t know how to describe…). Plus Adam is very uniform in texture, whereas Mustang has random veins and stuff. More than that, though, the Mustang’s head is more enjoyable. Adam’s is not defined enough. Life-like? Eh, I dunno, Mustang probably wins that race, since penises are not matte.
I think Tantus’ official stance on silicone lube is “try it first,” and with O2 I’d especially agree with them. It’s definitely more risky with O2.
September 11th, 2011 at 5:31 pm
Are you going to plant the dildo seeds? If so, please post an update. I’m extremely curious now.
October 28th, 2011 at 1:46 am
I’m really damn curious now as to what colours you do like and hate! Have you ever written about it? (I did a quick search but didn’t come up with anything) Would love to know, if you ever get the chance, since I have some pretty strong opinions about it too.
October 30th, 2011 at 2:06 am
@Blacksilk: Ha, haven’t written about it yet, no. I do have a draft about why I hate the color pink. But…
Colors I love: orange, green, yellow, sky blues
Colors I am fine with: red, black, darker blues, skin tones, white
Colors I do not like: pink, purple
November 1st, 2011 at 6:43 am
@Epiphora: Heh, I’m not surprised that your “do not like” colours are the same as mine (I actually really like a good purple as a colour, just not really for toys).
I’ve been meaning for aaages (ever since I found out my first rabbit had a FACE under the glans so it looks like a creepy mushroom man) to write a post about terrible sex toy aesthetics, mostly bitching about cutesyness, faces, pink, flowers and glitter. I should really get round to that.
February 20th, 2012 at 3:33 pm
I’d love a big box like that to turn up on my doorstep one day! *dreams*