[Pornfail is a new feature about, well, porn failures. Do you like?]
This one comes to us from the thoughtfully-titled Pound the Round 2. If you have sensitive teeth, click away now.
STEPS FOR GETTING A GIRL’S MOUTH AND POPSICLE ON YOUR PENIS
1. Randomly whip out your popsicle, calling it an “ice cream” — that was on purpose — and immediately take things too far by poking her genitals with it. And making an ass/popsicle sandwich. Watch it melt all over the chick in red streaks. Oh yeah, hot.
2. While the girl fondles your enormous cock, slowly introduce another popsicle. The clueless female will hardly notice. You so stealthy.
3. Bask in the sensation as the girl sucks both your cock and the popsicle. (Sidenote: in Australia, popsicles are called iceblocks. Therefore, ICECOCK!)
AAAAND LIFE COMPLETE.
If you liked this, you might also enjoy these posts:
Don't miss a post! Subscribe to Hey Epiphora 
July 30th, 2010 at 2:48 pm
Ha! Wise words of wisdom
…Fun feature idea. I like it!
July 30th, 2010 at 2:53 pm
I hope that shit doesn’t stain her white pants/shorts.
I’d be pissed if it did!
July 30th, 2010 at 2:59 pm
Yeast infections for everyone! So sexy.
July 30th, 2010 at 3:21 pm
@quizzical pussy: That’s what I was thinking. Also, a cock big enough to cause serious pain and probable injury to my cervix and vagina: not the hottest thing I’ve ever seen.
July 30th, 2010 at 4:10 pm
Sometimes I really just don’t get porn. Hmm. why would you want anything so dames cold touching your cock?
July 30th, 2010 at 10:20 pm
Gahhh, any time I see some kind of sweet confectionery near genitals makes my own vagina cry.
July 31st, 2010 at 7:58 am
Three things…
One – She has a very hot looking ass! (minus the melting red popsicle liquid)
Two – YEAST infection on the way
Three – Shrinkage (making me think of the Seinfeld episode – HAHAHAHA)
Oh hell.. Four – What’s with some of the names they use for porn movies???? WTF
July 31st, 2010 at 10:45 am
I’m with Vanilla Kinks. Though, my first thought was “ooh pretty popsicle.. on her fuckin’ asshole?”. Then I’m like… “her white shorts are getting all stained!”.
July 31st, 2010 at 5:05 pm
LOL porn…
Let’s hope that there aren’t any angry bees or wasps around.
August 1st, 2010 at 2:31 am
…I think I have a yeast infection from just looking at that.
August 1st, 2010 at 7:49 pm
the verdict here is that “Popsicle play” would “probably give me ‘ewww-dick’” which is apparently a “frat bro term to describe pornography that is so vulgar or disgusting that will prevent you from getting a boner or if you do get a boner it makes you feel disgusting & nasty – you know, ‘ewww’”
I just made him quote it several times to get the exact wording.
An evening just isn’t complete without “ewww-dick” and “boner” around here. lol
August 2nd, 2010 at 7:33 am
I am never going to be able to look at one of those ice lollies the same again.
xoxox
August 3rd, 2010 at 12:48 am
The only thing popsicles like that are good for (in sex, I mean) is putting in some pretty sub Twink’s ass. Not on women. Yeast infection city. Ew. I’m cringing at the thought… that’s just.. not.. right
August 3rd, 2010 at 1:43 pm
I definitely wouldn’t want a melting popsicle anywhere near my vagina.
Sucking on one while giving head, that’s another matter
October 4th, 2010 at 9:01 am
Now I think of this every time I hear “California Girls”
“So hot we’ll melt your Popsicle”
hahahahaha!!!!
October 4th, 2010 at 11:42 pm
This looks hilarious! Love the Pornfail, hope to see more
October 13th, 2010 at 8:24 pm
Maybe this is just because I got my alien fleshlight in the mail today and I got “alien on the brain but does that last pic look like she is sucking a human cock and some weird multi-colored alien creatures dick to anyone else?…Just me I thought so.
October 15th, 2010 at 6:05 am
Um, yeah . . . all I could think about while looking at that was “YEAST INFECTION,” too. Hope they paid her really well.
July 8th, 2011 at 6:39 am
Lol. Love the porn fail. Also, really like your blog.