May 122010
 

[Update: Please read my post EdenFantasys: A pattern of deception for more info about the sneaky
and downright unethical practices perpetrated by EdenFantasys. This post is just about my banning.]

Good morning to me!

Hello [my legal name],

Please be advised we have disabled your contributor account at EdenFantasys.com

This decision was  internal and is final.

Thank you,
Eden Team

Yes, this, from the website that introduced me to sex toy reviewing in 2007, and was the only place I reviewed for until I got my own blog a year later. Yes, this, from the website that awarded me second place in their “Sex Shop I Trust” campaign with my entry, “One year in Eden.” Yes, a vague and curt email without any warning whatsoever, with no room for discussion, and with no explanation.

I’m completely locked out; I cannot access my profile, my wishlist, my on-site reviews, my past orders, anything.

But don’t worry — the forums have an explanation!

We at Eden work really hard for the community — making it a safe, fun, and informative place to visit and to be enjoyed by any person. This is a 24/7 job, which requires all of our passion, attention and collective efforts.

However, there is a member of our community, Epiphora, that is having an adverse effect on the positive culture at EF — we get continuous complaints about her drama, rudeness, and overall negativity.

Today we collectively decided to ban her from the community. The decision is final and supported by the owner.

So there have been “continuous complaints,” yet I was never told about them. None of my posts have ever been flagged, and the only time I was ever emailed was in December, over this thread (in which I called people “fools,” a term I use endearingly). I have otherwise not been contacted in any way about any “misconduct.”

So who are all these people complaining about me? And what are they complaining about? I guess I’ll have to figure it out myself here. I sure as hell can’t defend myself on EF, despite their Expectations of Conduct saying that I should have the opportunity to do so.

The last thing I did on EF was post on this thread. I was annoyed by the forums being spammed by some dude welcoming every single new contributor. To me, it looked like a ploy to raise his rank. The next day, an explanation for the spamming was given, and I was not-so-discreetly chastised by several of the higher-ups at EF in this thread. I decided to bite my tongue; I didn’t reply to the thread.

Generally, I don’t comment/rate reviews very much, either. The only offending comment I can think of is the recent one I left telling a reviewer that her blog hurt my eyes. Because it does hurt my eyes. (I guess there’s this comment, too? Right, sure.)

Other than that? I can’t find much at all. I went back 20 pages sorted by “relevancy,” and then 20 sorted by “date” (a total of 400 forum posts going all the way back to a year ago). Go look for yourself (sort by date to see the most recent stuff), and if you find anything, by all means — let me know. These are the only ones I found that could be remotely called “negative.” Very remotely.

So tell me, does this warrant being banned without any warnings? People are very rarely banned on EdenFantasys. Usually they are warned — privately. Someone was banned 11 months ago, and he also got a forum post. Only this was EF’s explanation:

. . . This is not something we ever have to do — because we do not usually have instances where there are hateful comments being made to other members of this community. It is extremely rare and thus we take it extremely seriously.

It is one thing to disagree and to argue — as you all know, we don’t take a thread down or remove comments simply because someone starts arguing or saying something negative, even when they say negative things about the company, we do not censor.

But we draw the line at hate — when someone is calling another person hateful names, it will not be tolerated. At all.

Interesting how it’s supposedly okay to say negative things, yet I am banned for “overall negativity.”

Then came the boatload of insinuations from the off-site review person. Like that I visit EF “only to spread negativity and drama,” that I “deliberately criticize or insult other members just for the sake of doing so,” and that I “[spread] around negativity and drama like wildfire.” Again, examples please? I’m serious. I’d love to see them.

Well, apparently my painful-to-my-eyes comment was TAKEN VERY SERIOUSLY:

I have been working hard to not only introduce Eden Fantasys to parts of the blogosphere that have never before heard of us, but also to get them comfortable with us. And that’s hard to do when there are people undermining that work, effort and fragile trust by seeking out reviews to vote down, leave snotty comments on, etc. This goes hand in hand with what I said in my thread about the Off-site Review Program — bloggers have their own voices, just as all of you do, and they’re entitled to use those voices to present their reviews, even if they do so in a manner that you don’t agree with or find appealing — or on a blog whose layout you don’t find to be visually appealing.

So by this reasoning, anyone who rates a review “not useful at all” should be worried, as should the people who agreed with me that the blog is painful to the eyes. And by the way, I do not SEEK OUT reviews for any reason. I subscribe to the reviews RSS feed, and only open reviews of toys that look interesting to me. But sure, go ahead and spread lies.

This part — this is the part that really got me:

Epiphora’s recent behavior is nothing new; we made the decision to permanently ban her because she is a repeat offender, and the fact that she is a repeat offender clearly shows that she has no regard or respect for the community — that includes all of you, not just the “community” in terms of the forums here on Eden Fantasys and the EF staff.

Excuse me, but how dare you? Did you really just say that I have no respect for anyone, let alone the sex blogging community? Somehow I think my readers, followers, and friends would disagree. Entirely.

Apparently this has “been coming for a long time” and I am a “repeat offender.” Right. A repeat offender — and 2 1/2 year veteran — who was never warned. Never flagged. And who never committed any offenses worse than anyone else. The decision is final.

The sad thing is that this is not an isolated incident of weirdness; it’s a an unnecessary move by a company that has proven time and again to be manipulative and malicious. Others who have been burned much worse include AAG, Essin’ Em, ThatToyChick, and several others who have contacted me but wanted to stay anonymous. (Many, many more to be found in this post.)

I am tired of giving EdenFantasys the benefit of the doubt, since they refuse to give it to me.

[P.S. Thank you to everyone who has supported me today and who will continue to do so in the future. I love all of you.]

[P.P.S. This video makes my life. Thank you, Vin!]

Update — May 17th, 2010

An EdenFantasys administrator has replied to the thread now saying:

Epiphora has not contacted us since we emailed her regarding the ban. She has not been in contact to defend herself, to try to make amends, or even ask for a more thorough explanation of her banning. Considering Epiphora’s response to the banning was to create drama and tension via her blog, taking her complaints public rather than contacting us, and actively campaigning against us, we firmly believe our actions were the right ones to take and that amends are no longer an option.

Yes, because I should’ve replied to an email saying the decision was final with a plea for forgiveness for something I couldn’t even discern.

She has been contacted in the past, she has been warned in the past, both on the forums and in private messages and emails, and she has responded poorly. Banning was the next step.

Alright, let’s get this shit straight. I was contacted via email once, last December. Here is the email that was sent to me:

Are you flagging someone’s unqualified enthusiasm as “Spam”? We’re a bit confused about why you flagged something harmless, like the post on the thread below. There are plenty of similar posts all over the Eden forums that are essentially just people shouting in agreement or being silly — we’re not going to start policing people and calling ‘Spam’ on totally innocuous posts. http://www.edenfantasys.com/sex-forum/sex-toys/vibrators/gigolo-vs-galan/

Speaking of the forums, one of your posts on this thread (below) was very rude. You called people “Fools” and were condescending for no reason. No one knew the ulterior motive behind the thread post — which is understandable, and they were just expressing concern and curiosity. You could have been flagged “I think an apology would be helpful” and it would have totally justified.
http://www.edenfantasys.com/sex-forum/edenfantasys/suggestions/sending-things-to-users/

We do expect you to use the ‘Report Abuse’ flags with discretion.

If the reason for flagging is not entirely clear, perhaps you should send a message along with your flag.

Thanks!
– Victoria

So hey, if that counts as a warning, I certainly didn’t take it that way. I also don’t think my response was “poor.” Here is what my response was:

Victoria (and everyone else),

I flagged that as spam simply because it seemed like spam to me. That’s the only reason. I’m not trying to flag enthusiasm. I figured you guys could look into it and see if that person is an actual person or not. If that person is real, I’m sorry, but I was not meaning any harm. I’m kind of upset that you would automatically assume I’m trying to “police people . . . on totally innocuous posts.” I guess I just won’t flag things that look like spam anymore.

I would not call my post “very rude.” I use the term “fools” in my daily life in an off-handed and playful way. The rest of the post was nothing more than an explanation. Nobody reacted negatively to my post or took offense to it. If someone truly felt an apology was necessary, they would have flagged it or told me.

–Epiphora

As for being warned “on the forums,” I can’t recall any specific situation in which this has occurred. There have been plenty of “calm down, people” posts from admins on the forum, but nothing directed specifically at me, and nothing ever framed as a warning.

And to anyone who thinks I’m somehow lying about all this — why? What do I have to gain? Nothing. What does EF have to gain by making this sound justified? Everything.

Update: Please read my post EdenFantasys: A pattern of deception for more info about the sneaky and downright unethical practices perpetrated by EdenFantasys.

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  • Not really much to say that I didn’t say on twitter earlier today, just want you to know that I’m with you/support you.

  • Wow. Um… just… wow. I too have wanted to give EF the benefit of the doubt, but really, how many such benefits can they get after they keep fucking up and fucking up and fucking up? How many major members of the sex-positive community are they trying to alienate here?

    In any case I will no longer be taking my business to EF (not that I have in a long time with better companies around) and will no longer be recommending them to others as a good place to buy sex toys. I tried going in to my account with the intentions of deleting it, but couldn’t even find that option available. Go figure.

  • LOLmerrill

    what. the. FUCK. Whatever, E. You’ve simply outgrown them. Cheers.

  • I don’t see negativity in you at all. I see Honesty, and the refusal to be walked all over, confidence, and quite a way with words in your reviews. Not everything is rainbows and sunshine. Judging by that one thread, regardless of guilt or not, even if I didnt know you, I would NEVER become a member of EF. I refuse to go to a place where I feel like my right to free speech and to express my opinion would be severely restricted. The fact that they did that to someone I care about, even if we only @ each other on twitter every now and then, only makes it worse. I will NOT EVER become a member of that community.

    You Rock, Epiphora, you and your awesome socks and your take on reviews, and random interesting pics on Twitter.

    Keep up the amazing work

  • JenB

    Wow, that’s kind of scary. I wonder if by “negativity” they actually mean “honesty that might keep someone from buying a shitty but expensive toy and hurt our bottom line.” If that’s the case, then EdenFantasies is going to end up having a review system as skewed and useless as Amazon’s. How disappointing.

    I really appreciate your reviews and your comments. They’re honest and fun, not rude or hateful. Bummer that the stuffy schoolmarms have slapped you with their virtual ruler. 🙁

    EF just lost a customer. I’m behind you all the way.

  • Elodie

    Wow. I had no idea about any of this. Any company with that high a turnover of that many important people, any company that doesn’t pay people… ugh. And their owner is a misogynist? The owner of a supposedly “sex-positive” company? *headdesk*

  • Lauren

    Hey E, I’m sure you and I have butted heads in the distant past and I’m not sure if you would want me to talk to you or not but I wanted to email you if that is alright? If so, could you email me?

  • @Lauren: Of course!

  • They’re idiots! I’ve read AAG and ThatToyChick’s views on the EF tragedy and I have come to the conclusion that EF is a 18-wheeler-meets-little-old-lady accident waiting to happen if they don’t clean up their act both internally and externally. Glad I’ve never bought from them now.

  • Carnivalesq

    It’s not news to anyone that I am friends with Epiphora. Before I was friends with her, I was somewhat intimidated and held her up as the example. Her reviews set the bar, and I strove to review as solidly as she does. Aside from her clear talent at writing and web design, it was her honesty in reviews that really set her apart.

    While others were sugar coating reviews of sub-par products just because they were hopeful for more and more “free stuff,” Epiphora has always told it like it is. If a toy is crap, she says it’s crap. If it didn’t function as it should have, Epiphora says so. Epiphora is an honest, knowledgeable, confident and opinionated woman who is not always sunshine and pretty pink fluffy things because you know, not everything is awesome. Some ideas are bad, some stories are bull, and some toys are crap. And wherever there is bullshit, there will be Epiphora, standing nearby, pointing, and calling bullshit.

    Because… alas… Epiphora stands in the shadow of the statue.

    Okay, sorry, that got out of control. But seriously, this comment is sincere, aside from the Lost reference. Honesty does not equal negativity, as much as you try and say it does. EdenFantasys can suck my jizzunk, bitches.

  • Sarahbear

    What grates my nerves about it all is the inconsistency and the hypocrisy. Out of one side of their mouth it’s ‘We’re trying to be totally transparent.’ and then they are pretty much blatantly lying, or at least lying by omission. Every person that posts unveils one more piece of the not-fucking-transparent-at-all puzzle.

    I get that EF, as a business, has to make difficult decisions that are in the best interest of the company. Times are hard right now. They can’t afford to lose money in this economy. But, you also walk a fine line with PR. You piss off too many folks, or just the wrong folks, and you’ll wind up losing money too. For them to ban a contributing member of the community (though you admit you haven’t done reviews for them in a few months, but ffs, you have a toy collection that can be rivaled only by sex toy manufacturer warehouses!) is wrong. You contributed advice to many forums, even recently, and non-negative opinions. But because one or two mommy bloggers got butt hurt over being told their blog causes migraines you get banned? Bullshit. Especially with the other people who said the exact same thing and voted the exact same way. Especially when they say ‘you should have taken your issues to a private message and handled them discreetly’ and then they turn around and publicly shame you via a forum post, while also protecting the anonymity of the people who filed complaints. Especially when there are other contributors who are constantly causing drama, posting negative shit, voting down reviews or leaving snide comments.

    It’s inconsistent and it’s wrong. I’m glad you have this as a platform to get your side of the story out. People need to know so they can make educated decisions about which companies they affiliate with and review for.

  • Toys in Love

    As Carnivalesq we started reviewing online on Toys in Love after having followed E for a long time. – And doing so by trying to follow her example with personal and honest reviews. For us this was always the place we sought info on a toy before anywhere else. – And in all that time we never felt this place as a ‘negative influence’. – Just an honest place where you could be sure to get an honest post from a real person with real opinions…

  • Like I said on the Tweeter: What a bunch of DOUCHECANOES.

  • I think you know how I feel about this situation. I’m horrified and offended. I’ve said as much on the forum. I feel like there are a lot of us that have done a lot of promotion and publicity for EF that are seriously rethinking whether they deserve our business or promotion. I only want to give my support to sex-positive sites, and a site that can treat a contributor, any contributor, so negatively and disrespectfully isn’t positive in any way, shape or form.

    ILU <3

  • Red

    Woah. I’d love to say “I can’t believe this!” but I sadly *can* believe it…very easily. Sorry to everyone who’s been banned by the “all-accepting,” “sex-positive,” “safe” EdenFantasys.

    Also, that blog’s layout is absolutely terrible. Yick with a capital Y.

  • Aaron

    EdenFantasys? Who’s that? OMG SO DISRESPECTFUL I AM HEREBY BANNING MYSELF FOR MY DISRESPECT AND FOR UNDERMINING THEIR CRUCIALLY IMPORTANT WORK IN THE WORLD. I AM A SHAMEFUL PERSON.

  • Michael

    I shop at SheVibe instead of EdenFantasys. They’re usually a couple of dollars cheaper than EF and their shipping is dirt cheap. I only use EF for the “actual size” feature. 😀

  • @Michael: I like the way you work. SheVibe is awesome, and such a great deal.

  • aagblog

    I am sorry this happened to you, E.

    I wish I could say that I found it surprising. I don’t. EF has a long and well-documented history of taking its employees and contributors through this process:

    1. Romance: “We lurves your work so much! Come work with us! You’ll be awesome! In fact you’ll be *so much better* than everyone else!”

    2. Honeymoon: “You are so amazing! Your predecessor never did this kind of work! We want you with us forever and ever and ever and you’ll make sooooo much money and have sooooo much responsibility!”

    3. The Beginning of the End: “We have some problems with your work. This is not what we expected from you! You must do more, and better, and faster!”

    4. Threats: “If you can’t do better we will cut your payment rate / ban you!”

    5. Divorce: “You’ve not lived up to our expectations. You’re fired / banned. This is final. We will not discuss it with you.”

    6. Badmouthing to the Community: “Person X was awful for this community because of X and a whole bunch of stuff you couldn’t possibly understand. But we wanted to tell you all about it! Because we are transparent! And we love everyone! Except for the increasingly long list of people we’ve banned/fired/not paid! Everyone! Really!”

    7. The Process Starts Again: “Come work for us! It will be awesome!”

    I am sorry, E. No one deserves to have her name dragged through the mud as EF is fond of doing. 🙁

  • trish

    What I think is really telling in this whole thing is that EF is not abiding by its OWN rules in denying Epi a chance to defend herself. I also think it’s bullshit that they won’t tell her what, exactly, she did. I suspect they’re using the whole “we’re protecting the identity of her accuser” as a bullshit excuse to deny her the chance to know exactly what she’s accused of. If someone doesn’t like what Epi did, there needs to be an explanation of what that was. After all, if they allegedly don’t delete forum posts, it’s all public anyway, no?

  • One of the first times I heard of the company was when AAG had her problems with them. I decided then and there never to deal with them. When they sent me an email inviting me to their reviewer program I deleted it. I have never purchased anything from them, and hearing crap like this reinforces my decision.

    Posting about your ousting was unprofessional in my opinion. It’s not like a bricks and mortar setting where you could walk in and fuck things up – deleting your ability to post there took care of that.

  • Nell Gwynne

    Wow…

    As a non-sex blogger looking in from the outside, this is so high school. Seriously.

  • John

    Another amazing blogger gets too cool for EF!

  • Fuck ’em. Really. I’ve tried to bite my tongue and still support bloggers who support them, but me, AAG, ThatToyChick, the Misanthrope, Gus, Dellilah Douglas…I mean, this has been going on since early 2007. Fuck ’em.

    I told my higher ups what happenen, that one of the best sex toy bloggers on the internet got fucked over. They said to tell you (and everyone else), that you’re welcome with us, and while we don’t have forums, we want honesty and transparency and all times (hence the public comment). Tell us what you’d like to review, and we’ll make it happen.

    Plus, I can’t wait to meet you next week!

  • While I have never had any problems myself (I don’t participate too much in the forums) it boggles my mind that they would treat anyone this way. Knowing this isn’t the first and most likely won’t be the last is making me reconsider my dealings with them.

  • Nell Gwynne summed it up well for me. Your situation makes reminds me of the time I got fired from my job through a note. Yeah, sometimes people have to fired or let go. But there’s definitely a reasonable way to handle those situations vs acting like a petty child.

  • Backseat Boohoo

    Lord, this whole situation leaves a bad taste in my mouth and just makes me feel awful.

  • This is all so much bullshit. I’ve never purchased anything from Eden Fantasys and all I really knew about them for a while was that they’d screwed over a few different sex bloggers. You and EssinEm were the first sex bloggers that I started to read daily and that really got me into the sex blogging community. And they’ve fucked over both of you. Needless to say, I probably won’t be buying from them in the future. <3

  • I’m so sorry this happened to you and so confused by it as you and all others are. Like others too I wish I was surprised. It just reaffirms my decision not to deal with EdenFantasys, I stopped after what happened with AAG and have recently been considering contacting them again as things seemed to have been getting better. I will definitely not be doing so now.

    They are supposedly all about expanding and reaching out into new communities while alienating the people that help them get to that place of expansion, it’s ridiculous. I’m so confused by this public outing/humiliation in conjunction with the policy of conduct and that no one who works for EF seems to be arguing the fact that you were not given a chance to defend yourself and that their rules were broken, they’re just saying that it was done not how or why. So confused.

    Like many others have also mentioned you definitely set the bar as far as sex toy reviews go in my opinion, your reviews are always entertaining, well-written, and honest just like yourself. I hope you are able to move past this hurtful blow and continue to be the awesome and wonderful reviewer and person that you are. You are far too good for them anyway.

  • PandaDementia

    I’d never had any dealings with EF before, never visited their forum or bought anything from them, and I hadn’t heard about any of the previous problems with them until this was brought up. When I heard your story of having to deal with it, I immediately felt for you.
    It seems like they have a history of bad business dealings and their decision to call you out in a public forum was fucked up, especially if there was no warnings beforehand. I don’t know whether they decided to ban you because you wrote honest but not positive reviews or because there was negativity in your postings on the forum or both, but whatever the reason, they handled it extremely poorly.
    That being said, after going through as many of your forum comments as I could handle, it did seem like there were a lot of unnecessarily negative comments, some where it seemed like you got inexplicably defensive when there wasn’t need to be, and some where you may have been honest, but there was a lack of tact involved that may have set people on edge. The lime green blog is a good example of this. Yes, there were people who agreed with you, but they did so in a much more tactful way. Your comment offered no constructive criticism, all it did was come across as an attack. Others said, “Here’s what I did or didn’t like about your review, and by the way, the blog was hard on the eyes, you may want to think about changing that.”
    So, though I like you and your blog and think that how EF handled things was utterly ridiculous, I can see how they perceived your comments as being negative.
    After reading about the experiences that you and others have had with EF, though, I’ll certainly continue my trend of NOT dealing with them.

  • Their reviewing system has become diluted and unreliable. We think you’re great – we’re a small fish comparibly but whenever we have something to review you will be my first go to gal. Thank you for always being forthright – it’s what I love about you!

  • I’ve never dealt with EF, and after reading all this, I’m definitely not interested in dealing with them in the future.

    I think I speak for all the reasonable and responsible forum admins out there when I say that this was heinously unfair and I’m sorry it happened to you.

  • sophie2229

    So I’ve just noticed that EF “coincidently” removed the link to the review in question. I also clicked on the Isis on EF and the review written by Organic Girl (or whatever her name is on EF) did not even show up. I know that it was there yesterday, because I rated it as not useful at all. The actual review is still available at http://www.todaysdiva.ca/2010/05/edenfantasycom-isis-review.html, so I have a feeling that she wasn’t the one that took the EF posting down (I don’t think that’s even an option for contributors).

  • Aaron

    Also, to the people losing their minds over a “glass finger sleeve”? Call me when people start losing digits to guitar slides.

  • Cynthia

    @sophie2229:

    The Isis review by Organic Girl was removed upon the reviewer’s request. She and her husband felt so alienated by the rude comments left on the review that they have decided to withdraw immediately from the Eden Fantasys community. In the interest of transparency, we will republish the review for a short time (the URL Epiphora cited is valid) with all previous comments and ratings intact.

  • Elodie

    OrganicGirl is the lime green one, right?

    I can not look at her site. I told her I cannot look at her site, in the most civil way I could. It was unreadable. I’m sorry the fact that I literally could not read her site offended her. The fact that she would create a site that gives people horrible eye strain, and then get upset when people point out that it’s painful to look at, kinda offends me.

  • Damian

    Find yourself a no win no fee lawyer and sue for defamation in the British courts.

  • sophie2229

    @Cynthia: I think that we can all agree that it’s unfortunate that someone felt that alienated from comments posted on a review. Aside from Epiphora’s comment (which I do see why someone could take offense to since it was very blunt. I don’t think she meant it as offensive, and I sincerely hope that she wasn’t banned from EF because of this particular incident) I fail to see why this criticism is different than the criticism of any other review. In my opinion it took the reviewer way way too long to get to the point. Enough time was spent talking about the company/shipping that I almost closed the review thinking that she linked the wrong page. In my opinion, this is not useful at all for a toy review. And while she did write about the toy, she didn’t provide nearly enough detail to counteract the fact that any detail about the toy was presented far too late. If she deleted the extraneous information, I would have rated the review higher because it would have read better. In my opinion, I feel that it is my responsibility as a reviewer to to let her know that even though EF is an overall great company that that information does not belong in the toy review. After all, EF sponsors toy reviews, not company reviews. I wish that the reviewer would have voiced her concerns on the comments so we could clarify the fact that this was not meant to be a personal attack, just a suggestion to improve her writing since she’s new to the site.

  • LadyAstolat

    This is just rubbish! EF will not be getting any of my business. Had I realized they were like this previously I would have never brought them business in the first place. You’ve helped me so much and have never been anything short of awesome.

    Sadly I didn’t get to see the eye frying blog as the link no longer works. From what I’ve read tho, it sounds like they are the typical design-blind but somehow very proud of themselves types that can’t handle a critique at all. To them a critique, no matter how politely worded, is the same as a personal attack. It’s a no-win situation and completely not your fault.

    Just always remember the following:
    “If you’ve got haters then you’re doing something RIGHT!” 🙂

  • That’s unfortunate, I always enjoy reading your reviews and comments. I respect your honesty and appreciation for quality, not just trying to promote crap. That’s what reviews are all about, yes?

  • Courtney

    I just signed up for your blog a few days ago, and because of your reviews, (one specifically)
    I purchased Ella (OMGTY!). I have thoroughly enjoyed your writings, and I’ve read several
    reviews on EF. I think you are amazing, and whatever prompted this BS from ef, they screwed themselves, because you are awesome!

  • Sorry, I couldn’t not leave a comment on this. While I have no proof of this, I have heard of some companies doing odd things like this when reviewers are in their affiliate program, and are making too much money. It doesn’t sound like they booted you from earning affiliate money though. I will be very interested to see if they reverse their decision on this. It is beyond odd that they would not give you any sort of written warning.

  • John Pettitt

    This is why you can’t run a magazine and a store under the same management – it’s a conflict of interest that will never really work well.

  • Whaaaaat? This is some BULLshit, I literally just checked to make sure it wasn’t April 1.

    I am so sorry this has happened to you. I’m behind you all the way. What site shall I replace EF with on my blog?

  • Michele

    Shit, are you serious?! This is the first we’ve heard of it since we’ve gotten so tired of the schoolyard politics and favoritism in the forums that we don’t read them all that much anymore (and what bet we’ll be the next ones ditched for saying that? LOL). Anyway, we just want you to know that we’ve always looked up to you as a reviewer and think your writing is outstanding. Guess we’ll just have to haunt your blog more often now.

  • DevilBlueDress

    Epiphora,

    I do not support Eden in this. I have no damned idea what happened. I am however not afraid to post anything on Eden. If they ban me because of it, so be it. Contact me.

    I’ll post this entire blog post or anything else you want to write. (Let’s make sure the links work in Eden format – I don’t have a hell of a lot of random time.)

    Devilbluedress@gmail.com

  • ThatToyChick

    Little late to the comment party here, but it goes without saying where I stand. I think the commenter who mentioned cutting off one’s nose to spite their face fits perfectly in this situation.

    However, just like social cliques in high school, sooner or later everyone’s going to graduate and all of a sudden the popular table’s gonna be a real empty place to be.

    Your star is rising as their star is falling; you just collided on the way up, that’s all 🙂

  • Chin up, chuck x

  • I defriended/unlinked/unfollowed them over this and a number of other things and I know quite a few other people who have. Their conduct is absurd, unprofessional and shameful. I’m sorry you’re going through this lovely. Very, very sorry. =(

  • Superkitty

    I’m a longtime reader of AAG’s blog, and I thought what EF did to her was outrageous. This is more of the same bullshit from an obvious unethical company. I’d never spend a penny of my money there, and I’m going to be sure to tell my friends not to, either.

  • Wish I could say I was surprised. I’m so sorry this happened to you.

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  • Goth

    I’ve never had a problem with you on there, and I’ve never seen any drama or anything regarding you on the forum. Dove told me about what happened and then brought up something about span ID links and the like and then she, too, got banned. Now I’m getting very edgy and am reluctant to do business with them, though I’ll still go to at least look at the products. But now if I want items I think I’ll order directly from various manufacturers or other retail places.

    Sorry to hear that happened, and here I was starting my first blog to maybe review things and link on there and such, doesn’t seem worth it for them now.

    *hugs*

  • Add me to the list of the bad girls who were banished from Eden…just call me Eve 😛

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  • Ok, EF has the right to delete whomever they want to, but they should not have defamed you in the forums and they should definitely not be upset that you did not respond to a “final” decision with “appeals.” It is either final, or can be appealed, but not both.

    And so your wrote on your blog about it. Seriously, what did they expect? I review for them sometimes, but have never noticed what you say. I’m going to do more research and if EF really is as you portray them, I’m done with them.

  • Sarah Marlatt

    Wow. I am shocked and in total agreement with this blog post. You rock for being so genuine and honest!

    Actually I found the banning announcement and was very upset by it, because I’m a member of Eden and have been banned before, for a month. For flagging posts that were about rape that offended me, and for flagging posts for spam. I was also banned because I started a new account when they kicked me out the first time. What the hell? If I get banned again, I have decided never to go back.

    There are tons of people on that forum post that support you and were in defense of you, including me. I know what it feels like to be victimized in such a manner. I do consider Eden a clique of sorts.

  • Sarah Marlatt

    I just got an email from Eden Fantasys because I defended you on the forums! What the fuck! Am I not supposed to speak my mind?

    “Sarah:

    I’m writing about your posts on these threads:

    http://www.edenfantasys.com/sex-forum/edenfantasys/updates-feedback/feel-ef-s-posting-decision/#lastPost

    http://www.edenfantasys.com/sex-forum/edenfantasys/updates-feedback/community-announcement-1/4#lastPost

    What I want to know is why are you posting to these threads that are months old and were resolved and dealt with back then? This is not cool, Sarah, and frankly I’m appalled by what you said.

    You were not banned, you were suspended for a month. And you know very well why you were suspended:

    Creating multiple accounts
    Abusing EdenPoints
    Plagiarizing reviews

    Despite all of these egregious offenses, we were kind enough to welcome you back with open arms. And this is how you show your gratitude? I’ve been working with you and helping you contribute meaningfully to the threads, and this does not make me happy at all.

    Stirring up drama over a situation that you were not present for and giving the impression your suspension was unfair is out of line. I’d like to remind you that the community is very well aware of your past behavior and they were very supportive of our decision of your suspension.

    I’d like to point out two things from our Expectations of Conduct:

    We will not tolerate bullying, deliberate provocation or disrespect.

    Community members who conduct themselves poorly will have their individual behavior assessed by an EdenFantasys employee or representative. Penalties have been put into place in order to ensure that all members treat each other and the community as a whole with consideration and respect.

    This latest fiasco has you treading on very thin ice. I suggest you think over just what exactly is your place here and what good is stirring up unnecessary trouble. It seems you do not want to be here after all.

    Kristi Swadley
    Community Manager & Social Media Coordinator
    EdenFantasys
    http://www.edenfantasys.com

  • @Sarah Marlatt: And they closed the thread now. Sweep it under the rug! Quick!

  • @Sarah Marlatt:

    Well, I am laughing like crazy. That e-mail is so ludicrously unprofessional! But it’s EF, they’re good at “ludicrously unprofessional”.

  • @Sarah Marlatt: And…. someone flagged Ms. POSITIVE :-/ That email letter is so unprofessional! The things people do these days, for attention. SMH

  • Just… wow. Really? Wow, EF.

    Are they Russian?

    This smells like Communism

  • Monkeygurlie16

    Hey! I know exactly about this! I just got an email saying I might be banned from the forums soon!

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