Feb 032009
 

Lelo Luna BeadsI received the Luna Beads on a day near the end of the semester, a very cold day during which I’d locked myself in a bedroom to huddle up to the heater and write a paper about Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close. Usually when I get a toy in the mail, I open it and fondle it for a while, then put it away for later. But the Luna Beads do not induce orgasm/reduce their user to a puddle of goo, so I could use them right away. This was very exciting for me.

Lelo’s signature black box comes with two sets of Luna Beads — pink (28 grams each) and blue (37 grams each). The balls are fairly small, about bouncy ball size, and made of translucent ABS plastic. Within each ball is a smaller ball which rolls around, producing a sound that my boyfriend describes as “muffled marbles.” The balls have textured tracks circling them, meant to serve as markers for where to place the balls within their white silicone girdle.

I began with the more lightweight pink beads that first day. And oh man, getting up off the bed after inserting them the first time… I was in complete and utter heaven. The sensation of the balls vibrating inside their plastic housings was so exciting and interesting. It made my vagina say, “hello, I exist!” I began dancing, rocking in my desk chair, and walking around the apartment aimlessly. I couldn’t get enough of the feeling. How did I ever think I didn’t need vaginal balls? Yes, my vagina is as tight as a Chinese finger trap, but these beads feel supremely awesome just hanging out in there.

That is the only day I’ve ever used the pink beads. I just couldn’t resist moving past that atrocious color — plus, I have no self-control and wanted to see if I could “handle” the blue beads. I could; the blue beads didn’t feel any heavier to me, but the vibrations felt slightly more pronounced. Lelo’s instruction manual advises a vaginal workout regime involving pink beads first, then blue and pink, then blue, which I completely skipped. What can I say; I’m a rebel.

I have now worn the Luna Beads at home, to several social events, out to the grocery store, and to class. I have worn them practically all day, with no soreness or adverse effects. They cause me a bit of discomfort during insertion, but I use lube every time, and I’m getting better at sliding them in there. I have noticed that inserting from a laying down position is more effective; other positions have caused the beads to cluster strangely and feel weird. The key is to push them in as far as I can.

After my initial freakishly positive reaction to wearing the Luna Beads, I must admit that they don’t always make their presence known. Sometimes I’ll get up and walk around — and feel nothing. Other times I will. It’s unpredictable. I’ve found the best position for maximum roll to be on my side on the couch. Granted, I have to buck my hips like a crazy person, but it makes watching TV more exciting.

Another option is to clench the beads, which is surely the most effective thing to do. Like the rolling sensation, sometimes I will clench around them and feel as though I’m clenching nothingness. Other times I will be able to make the balls vibrate very subtly just by clenching, which feels delicious. I’ve enjoyed having the Luna Beads in while driving, as it gives me something to do at stoplights.

Removing the Luna Beads is simple. The cord may look flimsy, but I have yanked on it, and it stood up to me. My only issue with removal is that the Luna Beads sometimes pull my Nuvaring out with them. If you are a Nuvaring user, I would suggest removing the Luna Beads while lying down, then give the ring a little shove afterward. Do not pull the Luna Beads out while standing, especially over the toilet. I would know.

Speaking of toilets, this is one sex toy that I think deserves a bathroom report (stop reading here if bodily functions make you queasy). I have peed many, many times with the Luna Beads in, and have had no real hang-ups other than accidentally wiping the string into my butt. It feels a bit weird, but it’s manageable. However, I would not recommend pooping with Luna Beads in. It can be done, but it’s more trouble than it’s worth. The beads inevitably shift, wanting to escape the vagina, and it becomes uncomfortable.

Admittedly, I’m not concerned with making my vagina tighter. It’s tight enough as it is. I use the Luna Beads for fun — and if I happen to eventually have stronger orgasms and more toned vaginal muscles, awesome. So far, I haven’t noticed much of a difference (I feel like I have a bit more control over my vaginal muscles, but it may be a placebo effect), but I also haven’t worn the Luna Beads on a regular schedule. I just stick them in whenever I feel like it, which is getting to be more and more often. I’m actually starting to have, throughout the day, random moments of disappointment upon realizing that my Luna Beads aren’t in. That’s how much I love them.


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  • http://beautifuldreamer30.blogspot.com Beautiful Dreamer

    Wonderful review, as always!
    I’m glad you’re having so much fun with these in public!!

  • http://beautifuldreamer30.blogspot.com Beautiful Dreamer

    OH! And I totally think we all need to try Luna Bead hula hooping. Can you imagine?!

  • Toygirl

    Yay, I love mine, too! And I hear you on the Nuvaring thing.

  • Backseat Boohoo

    Please tell me you did not stick your beads on your cat when you took this picture.

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  • http://ofsexandlove.com Adriana

    Aww. I’m a sad panda. It seems I’m one of the few who just didn’t get anything from these at all.

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  • RaDD678

    I want these.badly. I wait tables for a living… can you imagine how AMAZING that would be?I run around ALL NIGHT! LOL! I am determined… i am getting my hands on a set of these and I am gonna wear them to work! At least it’ll keep a smile on my face :) and hey if I am having a shitty night I can help a table while doing jumping jacks or something…

  • Alisha

    I have hula hooped with these in… it was quite fun but honestly nothing beats just rolling around on the floor with your boyfriend when he doesn’t know you have them in…

  • http://sites.google.com/site/nancysreviewagogo/ Miss Dizzy Lizzy

    I don’t often just think about sex toys (I know, silly me) but I’ve been thinking about these since I read this. Do these work like ben wah balls? I have a set of ben wah balls that I don’t ever use, and I feel bad about neglecting them. But this looks like fun, and easier, too!

  • http://heyepiphora.com Epiphora

    @Miss Dizzy Lizzy: Luna Beads are a version of ben wa balls, but improved. Since they have little balls inside them that roll around, I would think they provide more sensation.

  • coss1e

    @RaDD678: You fucken rock babe have fun with it. will be the best night of work in your life haha

  • sophie2229

    I love my Luna beads! And thanks for the recommendation about the blue beads, I started with the pink ones, and I’m never going to use them again!

  • http://suburbanhousewife.tumblr.com/ AB Smith

    thanks for the review! I have the emigi – but probably should have started with bigger balls like luna beads, as I have had two 9 lb kids the hard way and have trouble keeping the emigi in for walking around

  • Selective Sensualist

    I’ve noticed that I feel my Luna Bead randomly as well. Some days I feel them a lot, while I don’t notice them as much on other days . . .

    I still really like them though — they are really fun to wear.

  • Bri

    I have the Emigi from Sinfive and like it, but I still wanna try the Luna Beads. I like that you choose the weight and can customize it for yourself.

  • Crystalline

    Very interesting! I’ve never really thought about vaginal beads, but your review makes me wonder. And thanks for the bathroom report; it’s relevant and informative.

  • http://twitter.com/sbmsvschoolgirl sbmsvschoolgirl

    Ok, these sound like so much fun, wearing them around to the store and to class :) I would definitely like to try them!

  • desuetude

    So, no problem peeing? I love them, but am aware that they constrict my urethra in some way.

  • http://heyepiphora.com Epiphora

    @desuetude: Peeing does put some pressure on the beads, but I can handle it.

  • Sarah Marlatt

    I just noticed these were on your blog banner. Ha! Cool. De ja vu.

  • Rachel

    You are my favorite reviewer because you don’t shy away from the real and gross questions folks may have about products. (ex: if you can have the beads in while shitting) Hats off to you!

  • mwwwww

    Can u have sex with the Lelo Luna Beads in you

  • http://heyepiphora.com/ Epiphora

    Um… I wouldn’t recommend it…

  • NWink

    I got my Luna Beads yesterday, so I tried them immediately (wore them to an exam)… and I almost didn’t feel them. But today when I put them in – amazing! I didn’t want to sit down. I voluntarily washed the dishes and cleaned the kitchen (while dancing like an idiot). They are a bit unpredictable, but I love them already!

  • ShannonD

    This review desperately makes me want Luna Beads… had to pop over here to comment on this post, of course, for your giveaway. I’ve been dreaming about Luna Beads since I read your post but I rarely/never buy things for myself. Your description of being able to do homework while wearing them is so amazingly awesome and I need to copy that. Also, Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close <3

  • unepersonne

    Any idea when you will review the luna beads mini? I’ve been waiting for your review to help me decide which ones to get. I’m a bit apprehensive of getting the big ones because…they’re big, but apparently the minis are pretty noisy, so wearing them in public might be an issue. Also, I have a nuvaring…do you think I could wear the big ones with the nuvaring? Would it all fit in there?

  • http://heyepiphora.com/ Epiphora

    Fairly soon, but I can tell you that I’m not a fan of the Luna Beads Mini. I can’t feel them. I haven’t had the noise issues that others have had; I can’t hear them at all when they’re inside of me. But the problem is that they’re too small, with not enough space for the balls to roll around… so I can’t feel anything. Disappointing.

    You can definitely wear the big ones with the NuvaRing. I’ve done it a lot. The only thing you have to worry about is when you remove the beads, your ring will most likely come out with them. So just be ready for that!

  • Destiny Cat

    you convinced me, i had to get them. they were amazing, and are still amazing, and they are in RIGHT NOW. good lord….

  • stacey

    I love my luna balls. I have also found I will feel them sometimes, and other times I won’t. For me I think it depends how far up I insert them. If I insert them high up I won’t feel them as much, and they would just stay there, and probably never come out if I didn’t remove them…lol. If I don’t push them up as high I can feel them a lot more. Makes being at work more exciting I can tell you. Not sure if I should try the minis, because I can keep the Lunas in for like hours on end.

  • http://twitter.com/CarynSKA Yersinia Pestis

    I think this is the third time I’ve read through your Luna Beads review, and the first time reading it while wearing my own set!

  • aziajs

    So, I wonder how it would feel to wear these with the Romp or Ryder.

  • Glumbumble

    Do you have to do kegal exercises while wearing these in order to get the full effect (ie, a more toned vagina), or does just having them in do the same thing? My doctor recommended kegals to try to teach me how to voluntarily relax the muscles (I have vaginismus), but sometimes I just feel silly or like I’m not doing anything right when I do do them.

  • http://heyepiphora.com/ Epiphora

    I’d say you definitely do have to do kegels in addition to wearing them. They don’t tend to want to escape, so you don’t have to actively hold them in, which makes me think serious toning would require more work. Vag balls are nice because they provide resistance and incentive (stimulation) that just doing kegels normally doesn’t provide.

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  • skookum

    Sometimes I’ll get up and walk around — and feel nothing. Other times I will. It’s unpredictable.

    For me it depends on which way the silicone harness is inserted. The “nook” (Lelo’s name for the circular portion that holds each bead) makes the bead wider in one direction but not the other. If the harness is inserted so that bands of the nooks are facing front and back, I have significantly more sensation and can occasionally hear a faint rattling. If the bands are facing the sides of my body, there’s less sensation, less sound, and I often forget the beads are even there.

    This makes sense because the vagina isn’t a symmetrical tube – it tends to flatten horizontally – so if the harness is rotated against that axis, of course there would be more sensation. That’s my theory, anyway :-)

  • Whitney

    Finally got my set in the mail. I’m wearing one blue bead right now and shimmying in my computer chair like a crazy person. I feel like I could wear it all day. These are so much better than the minis!

  • Sheeps

    Well, considering the pelvic floor muscles can be exercized by simply masturbating, that’s no surprise; but hecka fun! :)

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