worth every damn penny

Eroscillator 2 Plus vs. Top Deluxe: is 35% more power worth $55 more?

05.07.13
Eroscillator Top Deluxe and Eroscillator 2 Plus

For years, literally, ever since I dubbed the Eroscillator “the best sex toy I’ve ever tried,” people have been asking me whether it’s worth the extra cash to get the Top Deluxe version of the toy. I’ve always had to say “I don’t know; mine is the more powerful one and I’ve never tried the regular [...]

Review: Splash

11.20.12
Tantus Splash, a well-read dildo

The Tantus Splash looks like it’s in the midst of being slimed. And if it were a celeb at a Nickelodeon awards show, it’d be grinning and taking it like a champ. Because life is good for the Splash. It is a dildo that stands out aesthetically, but also succeeds internally. It doesn’t have to worry [...]

Review: Mona 2

11.12.12
LELO Mona 2

It’s kind of ridiculous how much I like my LELO Mona 2. Fuck it, love. It just feels weird to say that because the Mona is such a simple toy. It’s not a revolutionary shape, and in fact, it’s been around for some time and I’ve all but ignored it. So it is sort of [...]

Review: Pure Plugs

09.26.12
njoy Pure Plugs (medium and large)

I could’ve written a review for the njoy Pure Plugs before ever putting a single one in my ass. Of course, I would never do such a thing. And sometimes, my hunches about toys are way off. But in this instance, I’d like to gloat about the fact that I was totally and completely spot [...]

Review: Mustang

10.03.11
Vixen Creations Mustang

[Eeee! This incredible dildo now comes in neon pink, neon green, and tie dye in addition to the skin tones!] Oh my god. This thing. You guys. This thing. It is SO GLORIOUS. It’s been nearly a year and a half since I fell in deep love with dual-density VixSkin, but not once in that [...]

My love, the Pure Wand (+ a few tips!)

07.26.10
This is an accurate representation of what the Pure Wand looks like after I use it.

You have come here wondering if the njoy Pure Wand is deserving of its legendary status. If this parenthesis-shaped pound and a half of medical-grade stainless steel can indeed change your — and your G-spot’s — life.   The answer is yes. Holy fuck, yes. Your G-spot will never be the same. You don’t even [...]

Review: Johnny

06.20.10
Vixen Johnny

I did it. I got Johnny — a realistic dildo with BALLS. And VEINS! And… and… balls! (Keen readers will point out that I’ve already had one realistic dildo with balls: Mr. Man. This is true. Mr. Man’s balls are very perky, though, which somehow makes it easier to consider them anything-but-balls. Johnny’s balls droop [...]

Love letter to the Turbo Glider

05.31.10
Turbo Glider

Dearest Turbo Glider, Hello, my dear. It’s been a while, I know. A few trysts here and there, but things between us are nothing like they used to be. I understand if you feel neglected; I barely get you out from the drawer at all. The truth is, my clit now prefers less buzzy, more unique [...]