Since I can't put "extensive sex toy knowledge" on a resume, I'm putting it in a blog. My reviews are snarky, unflinchingly honest, and delightfully void of the term "battery-operated boyfriend."
I knew my Xtreme Pack G-spot bullet would die; it was just a matter of time. It had already outlived its price tag and the amount of times I recklessly washed it. The inevitable happened a couple weeks ago. And now, after a year and a half of wonderful times, I am laying my Xtreme [...]
There’s only so much you can say about a $20 vibrator, and so I won’t say much. The Waterproof Slender Probe measures 6 3/4″ in length, with a diameter of 1″. It takes two AAA batteries, easily loaded into the base. There are horizontal seams galore — one on the shaft, and one on the [...]
I knew the OhMiBod was a shoddy piece of crap from the get-go. I just didn’t have quite enough justification to state that blatantly in a review… until last night when my OhMiBod died. After about 1.5 uses, and right after I finished compiling a 33-song playlist of songs to test, it stopped working. As [...]
It’s not every day you receive a postcard along with a sex toy. Along with a packet of materials explaining and promoting the toy itself, my package included a postcard of a panoramic photo of Thirroul, NSW Australia. On the back was written, “we thought we’d send you a postcard of where the Be Be [...]
I’ve been curious for a while now about the Xtreme Kit. I am unabashed in my creepy allegiance to the Xtreme Pack G-spot bullet, but I always wondered if the Xtreme Kit was just as good. No, the bullet shapes aren’t the same, and I figured the Xtreme Pack would still win in that area, [...]
I received the Luna Beads on a day near the end of the semester, a very cold day during which I’d locked myself in a bedroom to huddle up to the heater and write a paper about Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close. Usually when I get a toy in the mail, I open it and [...]
[Update: LELO has updated the Mia since this review. Read my review of the new version.] Here is who I am: I got very excited when I received a 2GB jumpdrive as a gift. I anxiously await every new version of Firefox. I install a bazillion extensions and scripts to customize it. I have a [...]
