There’s been a lot of pomp and hype surrounding the Fun Factory Stronic line: an alleged 18 months of development, a YouTube trailer filled with innuendo and no actual facts, a video of people racing the toys across a table, and a side-eye-inducing claim that 87% of women prefer them over vibrators. Listen, bub, you’re not gonna usurp [...]

Usually it takes a bit of time for my screaming endorsements to seep into the consciousness of my readers. Especially when the toys I love cost a pretty penny. But not this time. I flailed about the Jopen Comet G Wand less than two months ago, and I’m already getting reports back that peeps have bought and [...]

[Alert! SheVibe has 15% off the G-spot Lollipop Double Pop through June 18th!] The G-Spot Lollipop J-Pop begins with a mistake — by getting way too literal about things. Always an ominous sign. Since it’s wrapped up like a fucking lollipop, I believe I’m fully within my rights to scream DO NOT PUT ACTUAL LOLLIPOPS IN YOUR VAGINA! OR POPSICLES! OR [...]

It’s only February, and the Jopen Key Comet G Wand has a very good chance of being the best sex toy I try all year. I am, I must say, flabbergasted. I mean, this is Jopen we’re talking about. Jopen, creators of the what-the-fuck that is the Intensity. Jopen, whose parent company is California Exotic. Jopen, who must think they are naming perfumes [...]

These people just cut to the chase. They called their company Fucking Sculptures. I like that gumption. I like it a lot. Fucking Sculptures is a brand new (seriously, their launch party was on December 23 and included glassblowing, burlesque, and pizza — why wasn’t I there?!) glass dildo company based in Berkeley, California. Their dildos are [...]

Want to ask me a question? Email me at hey.epiphora [at] gmail [dot] com, or ask here. How often do you masturbate? You have quite a collection of toys; do you end up using most of them? Generally, every other day. Sometimes I go days and it’s just a mistake because I always come too fast [...]

Ahhh, yearly traditions! As 2012 comes to a close (how did that happen, though, seriously?!), the time has come for me to recount my most loved and most hated sex toys that I tried this year. As in 2011 and 2010, I’ll first list the best/worst toys, then give out faux awards such as “Most Heinous [...]

I like toys that do all the taking-good-photos work for me. The Crystal Twist is one of those toys. As if the Crystal Twist was not pretty enough to begin with, Shellie has gone and added incredible color highlights to it. This is the reinvented Crystal Twist Color in gold. It also comes in red, cobalt blue [...]