I’m finally at a point where I can shell out the cash for a monthly porn DVD subscription. THIS IS VERY EXCITING! I’ve been wanting to do this for ages. It was a bit of an experience figuring out just which service to use. I eliminated WantedList pretty quickly when I found they did not [...]

July 1st, 2010 I have learned a lesson about lube bottles. Before use, always cautiously test to make sure the nozzle is not plugged up. Today, attempting to lube up a toy, my lube split-streamed on me and sprayed itself on my shirt. Classy. July 6th, 2010 Having watched a lot of porn in a [...]

June 6th, 2010 Here’s a little secret for you: I’ve been jacking off to words lately. I know, blasphemy. I usually hate erotica. I generally don’t fantasize. I prefer graphic depictions of genitals going into other genitals. But this particular fiction — a slash pairing which is morally objectionable on more than one level — is [...]

April 6th, 2010 Wow, most frustrating masturbation session in a long time. I watched, but not really, Fashionistas, which wasn’t doing it for me at all (o hai, latex). I tried out the Form 6, but got irritated with the buttons being on the shaft, which is fully insertable. The straw that broke the camel’s [...]

There will be squirting, tons of it — onto faces, asses, assholes, sheets. There will be spitting, punching, smothering, choking. There will be feet in mouths and feet in vaginas. There will be a toe in a butt. There will be amazing sex toys. And then there will be me — trying to keep myself [...]