You know those butt-ugly animals, like hairless cats and shivery Chinese Cresteds, that instinctively disgust you — until you fall in love with one, and then you want to bitch out anyone who dares judge your snookum-wookum on its external appearance? That’s how I’ve become, very quickly, with the Eroscillator. It is my darling, my [...]

I always wondered why nobody tried to really shrink the Hitachi Magic Wand. That thing is unwieldy as fuck — heavy, long, with a head that really is bigger than it needs to be. It numbs my entire vulva within minutes — an unfortunate side effect of using the most powerful vibrator in existence. Finally, [...]

My boyfriend is probably the only dude on the planet who, upon hearing the question “do you want a Fleshlight?”, responded with a shrug. But it’s not the Fleshlight’s fault he felt this way; based on past experiences, he was convinced no masturbation sleeve would ever wow him. But let me put it this way: [...]

For a set of restraints, the Sportsheets Under the Bed Restraint System seems to make a dangerous declaration: fuck bedposts. Having never tried restraints until now, and lacking bedposts, I have no problem with this statement. Especially because this system convinced me that an alternative method of restraint is not only possible; it may be [...]

So we’ve already established that rough sex, when directed and shot by genius pornographer Tristan Taormino, is hot as fuck. What could possibly make it hotter? Let’s see… how about casting hot, strong women and having them call the shots? How about interviewing the performers prior to the scene to discuss roughness and trust? Yeah, [...]

Things that I like: green toys, toys that look like ice cream. But I’ve tried one before, the Fun Factory Twister, and it was a bit of a flop. More than anything else, the dial base was finicky, and the battery compartment was non-intuitive. These issues can make any green-colored and ice cream-shaped toy instantly [...]

The S-shaped NobEssence Seduction looks more like a beautiful decorative sculpture than a dildo. Made of Purpleheart wood and sealed with NobEssence’s signature Lubrosity coating, it is elegance incarnate. But not just aesthetically; I quickly realized that it also felt elegant while in use. As in, up my cooch. Um. See. The Seduction is incredibly lovely [...]

What am I gonna do with you, Tristan Taormino? Really, if you keep making innovative and hot porn like this, people are going to stop believing me when I drool all over your stuff. Oh well — the truth is, Tristan Taormino’s Expert Guide to Anal Pleasure for Men is as delicious as it sounds. It’s [...]