10.03.12

4-year blogiversary giveaway — 15 prizes!

Four motherfuckin’ years, my friends. That’s how long this blog has been chugging along. If you know me at all, you know I’m a fan of throwing epic blogiversary giveaways each October to thank everyone for following my escapades, and this year is no different. Well, except it’s even BETTER than years past, because I have rounded up FIFTEEN PRIZES for y’all.

As always, I am only giving away toys I’ve tried and loved, with the brief exception of the Tantus Pack ‘n Play No. 2 which I’m sure is awesome, and the Fleshlight which I do not have a cock to behold with. I also tried to wrangle a range of items: vibrators, dildos, butt plugs, a masturbation sleeve, a packer, and even a harness, so hopefully there is something that calls your name. Some prizes are also open to international readers! Yes!

Here’s what you need to do. Scroll through the list, ogle the photos, and decide which toy you want to enter for (yes, you have to choose just one — pick the one you want the most!). Make sure it can be shipped to your country. Write down its name if you are prone to forgetfulness. Then fill out the Rafflecopter form at the bottom and cross yer fingers.

I’ve broken it down into international vs. U.S. (and sometimes Canada) for ease of… everything.

Open to everyone / international readers

 

Tantus Splash

The Tantus Splash, donated by Tantus. A highly-textured masterpiece of dual colors. I haven’t finished my review of this one yet, but let’s just say that I QUOTE THE BIBLE IN IT.

Open to international readers — you agree to pay customs/duties fees if applicable.

LELO Luna Beads

The LELO Luna Beads, donated by LELO. I’ve tried a lot of vaginal balls since I got my Luna Beads in 2009, yet nothing has ever topped them. So I was like “fuck it, I’m giving away Luna Beads again.”

Open to international readers!

Crystal Delights Star Delight

The Crystal Delights Star Delight, with the winner’s choice of Swarovski crystal color, donated by Crystal Delights. One of the only glass dildos you’ll ever need. Just look at it.

Open to international readers!

Tantus Ryder

The Tantus Ryder, donated by Tantus. This is one solid motherfuckin’ butt plug. Perfect for a full sensation but comfortable enough to wear for long periods of time.

Open to international readers — you agree to pay customs/duties fees if applicable.

Jollies / Chavez Dezignz Jollet

The Jollies / Chavez Dezignz Jollet, donated by Chavez Dezignz. This is another one that I tried years ago and still haven’t gotten over. It is a rigid, G-spotting dream, and comes in sparkle, polka dot, and even skull iterations, which the winner will get to choose from.

Open to international readers!

Tantus Cush O2
The Tantus Cush O2, donated by Tantus. It stimulates the front walls of my vagina amazingly with its dual-density material and impeccable design. You can even have it in pink if you are insane so desire.

Open to international readers — you agree to pay customs/duties fees if applicable.

Tantus Pack 'n Play No. 2

The Tantus Pack ‘n Play No. 2, donated by Tantus. The world needs more hygienic packers, and this one looks fantastic.

Open to international readers — you agree to pay customs/duties fees if applicable.

Open to U.S. readers only (and sometimes Canada)

njoy Pure Plugs

The njoy Pure Plug, in your choice of size, donated by SheVibe. Um. Yeah. Basically, everyone who is into anal play needs one of these plugs. They are incredible little things.

Open to readers in the U.S. or Canada only.

Vixen Creations Mustang

The Vixen Creations Mustang in NEON GREEN, donated by Vixen Creations. IT’S NEON GREEN. And it’s made of VIXSKIN, one of my favorite materials of ALL TIME. Can you tell I’m a little excited?

Open to U.S. readers only.

Kelly Shibari Fleshlight

The Kelly Shibari Fleshlight , donated by Fleshlight. Molded after badass BBW icon Kelly Shibari, this Fleshlight features the Lotus inner texture meant to mimic the vaginal canal. I want to touch it.

Open to readers in the continental U.S. only.

We-Vibe Touch

The We-Vibe Touch, donated by We-Vibe. It may look like a potato, but it’s actually an awesome and rumbly clitoral vibe that really surprised me. Plus it comes in TEAL, but I won’t judge you (too much) if you choose one of the other colors.

Open to readers in the U.S. or Canada only.

Fun Factory Big Boss

The Fun Factory Big Boss, in epic orange, donated by She Bop. If internal vibrations are what you crave, oh, oh, you need this. Just remember, it is a beast.

Open to U.S. readers only.

The Leaf Life, donated by Babeland. Pinpoint clitoral stimulation is this vibe’s specialty, although it’s pretty good at disguising itself as a leaf also.

Open to U.S. readers only.

The Spareparts Hardwear Joque harness in your choice of size and color, donated by Early to Bed. In my opinion, it’s only harness a person really ever needs. It’s so comfortable you’ll forget you’re wearing it.

Open to U.S. readers only.

Vixen Creations Leoweenie

The Vixen Creations Leoweenie, donated by Vixen Creations. Or you can call it by its street name, BATCOCK. Just in time for Halloween. A good way to make sure the kids never return to your house for candy?

Open to U.S. readers only.


Ready to enter? Excellent!
a Rafflecopter giveaway

Deadline: October 20th, 2012 at 11:59 p.m. EST.

Restrictions:

  • All winners must be 18+.
  • The winners of the Vixen Creations Mustang, Fleshlight, Fun Factory Big Boss, Leaf Life, Spareparts Hardwear Joque, and Vixen Creations Leoweenie must live in the U.S.
  • The winners of the njoy Pure Plug and We-Vibe Touch must live in the U.S. or Canada.
  • International winners agree to pay customs/duties fees if needed.

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  • http://heyepiphora.com/ Epiphora

    I already do that! Each year in December I do a list of the best/worst toys of the year. Here’s 2011 and 2010. Be on the lookout for 2012!

  • http://heyepiphora.com/ Epiphora

    I’ve implemented a suggestion box where you can drop your ideas. Otherwise, I sometimes do polls on Twitter about which toys to review next!

  • http://heyepiphora.com/ Epiphora

    I’m doing this in my monthly newsletter!

  • http://heyepiphora.com/ Epiphora

    I will always mention if a toy dies on me. Your best bet, though, is a rechargeable toy, and many of them come with warranties.

  • http://heyepiphora.com/ Epiphora

    If I really love something, I usually find time to review it. The things I don’t review that just sit in my toybox are usually toys I’m indifferent about.

  • http://heyepiphora.com/ Epiphora

    What a compliment!

  • http://heyepiphora.com/ Epiphora

    Do you realize how much time it would take me to pull out all my toys and take a photo? I think I’m having a heart attack just thinking about it.

  • http://heyepiphora.com/ Epiphora

    I’ve been known to force my boyfriend to try some sleeves. He’s a bit reluctant to try more, but we just got three new Fleshlights in the mail to review, so GET READY!

  • http://heyepiphora.com/ Epiphora

    I do!

  • http://heyepiphora.com/ Epiphora

    I created a suggestion box!

  • http://twitter.com/kissinbluekaren Karen

    I am sure all of your collection would be a nightmare to pull out. But some, maybe the most used. I loved your storage post. I am just really curious about where you put your massive collection.

    Also, what do you do with toys you don’t/won’t use. I have thrown them away when I couldn’t sterilize them but given away a large chunk of my toys.to some deserving friends. I am just curious and noisy about your collection.

  • http://heyepiphora.com/ Epiphora

    The storage posts detail everything there is to know about my storage. I’m obsessed with my plastic drawers and just bought another stack of them, actually.

    I give them to friends or swap them. But I like to hoard them, too. I’m bad about letting things go. I always worry I’ll need something for comparison purposes in the future.

  • http://www.facebook.com/shadowed.seductress Shadowed Seductress

    Just seen this through that disqus thing. You’re welcome!