Review: Penetralia Number 66

Aside from a handful of super indie manufacturers and some really sad bigwig attempts, wooden sex toys have primarily been the domain of NobEssence for quite some time now. But there’s a new brand on the block, and it’s called Penetralia. Usually new sex toy manufacturers make me yawn, but not this one. I love wooden toys and I will put them ALL INSIDE OF ME. With wood, I am shameless.

Which reminds me — I love the name Penetralia. It sounds chic, but it’s also in-your-face (or as my friend put it, “it is crass and fancy”). Like, make no mistake, these toys are going to PENETRATE YOU. But… elegantly.

Fully expecting the Penetralia Number 66 to come haphazardly wrapped in bubble wrap or tissue paper, I was blown away to see that actual thought was put into the packaging. It comes in a wooden tube that ties shut with a piece of leather. Stickers spelling 66 are on the end, looking only slightly demonic. Info about the toy is on a sheet of paper inside.

My Number 66 is made of Cocobolo, as if it didn’t already remind me of the NobEssence Romp enough (I’m not gonna put it in my butt, though — too big). Mine’s 6.5″ long and just barely 1.6″ in diameter at its widest, but these are handmade toys and each one will differ slightly.

Out of the tube, this toy doesn’t look as polished as a NobEssence piece. The edges, while soft, are not as fluid — the angles are a bit more amateur, like they weren’t sanded to death — and the coating isn’t as shiny or thick. Penetralia toys are coated with “a minimum of 3 layers of SmartCA,” but I can feel the grain on this dildo more than on my NobEssence toys.

But none of those small imperfections really come into play, because the Number 66 feels amazing in my vagina. I usually insert it in the opposite way as my photo shows — so that it curves up against my G-spot at the tip. But if I’m really riled, I can insert it the other way — so the bump hits me nearer to the entrance of my vagina — and it’s even more intense. Either way, it’s a really awesome G-spotter. It’s frictionless but stiff enough to make its presence known, and short enough that it never even touches my cervix.

The handle is supposed to have “finger grips,” but you know me — I never seem to be able to use that crap intuitively. All that matters is that I can fit two fingers against the handle and shove the dildo around when the moment’s right. Also, the handle is very non-obtrusive and does not impinge on clit stimulation. This toy sits with enough space between my body and that handle that I can use the marshmallow Eroscillator attachment on my clit. Perf.

There’s an effortlessness about this one that I really love, the way I can slide it in and just leave it there. Set it and forget it! It reminds me a lot of the Jollies Jollet, which has a similar shape. The Jollet is girthier and longer, though, and its silicone produces more drag. Thrusting with the Number 66 is even smoother.

I have nights where the effort involved with masturbation daunts me. All I want is a single dildo to do all my bidding. But of course, I have requirements, like 5,000 of them: it must be not too big, but not too small, it must not skimp on the G-spot stimulation but it must not require a lot of thrusting or arm work or a bucket of lube or warm up or cervix softening. The Number 66 fits into that box exactly, and trust me — not many things do. Perhaps no things, until this one.

So far the Penetralia line consists of Number 23, Number 28, Number 33, and Number 66. The slap-a-number-on-it naming system gives me uncomfortable Jimmyjane flashbacks, though. A tip, Penetralia: naming your toys like this may not be the best idea. People who Google “Number 66” are probably numerology nuts, not folks looking for a glorious wooden dildo. So, work on that. Otherwise, keep making awesome shit. I like it.

Penetralia has gone the way of the dinosaur, but there are still amazing wooden toys made by NobEssence. Read my reviews and then browse their line at SheVibe.